The Other Side of the Door

Day 13: The Other Side of the Door (I Got the Patch!)

​I told you the next time we spoke, I would be on the other side of my appointment.

​Well, I am officially on the other side. And let me tell you, the air over here is so incredibly sweet.

​This morning, I walked into the endocrinologist's office carrying the weight of 41 years of hiding. I walked out carrying a prescription for my future. Today, March 31st, I officially started my gender-affirming hormone therapy. I have my 0.1 mg/24h estradiol patches, my official 100 mg spironolactone, and a heart so full it feels like it might burst.

​Sitting in that office and going through the motions, getting the baseline bloodwork drawn, talking about the lab panels, and discussing the actual mechanics of how my body is going to change, made it all so brilliantly, wonderfully real. For the last 12 days, I’ve been taking blockers, quietly clearing out the old machinery. Today, we finally introduced the spark that is going to light up the rest of my life.

Knowing I have that prescription felt like holding the keys to my own cage. And the best part was looking over and seeing my partner, Gabi, right there beside me. We’ve shared 35 years of history, and getting to share the joy, the relief, and the sheer magnitude of this morning with her is something I will never take for granted. We are truly walking this path together.

​I know the physical changes from the estrogen patch won't happen overnight. Transitioning is a slow, steady marathon, not a sprint. But the mental shift? That happened the second I sat down in that office. The noise is gone. The fear that kept me locked away for four decades has been entirely replaced by peace.

​To anyone reading this who is still in the waiting room, whether you are waiting for your own appointment, waiting for your courage, or just waiting for the world to catch up to who you are, keep going. The cost of this peace is high, and the goodbyes are hard, but the moment you get to say "hello" to your true self makes every single second of the wait worth it.

​The lock is broken. I am Serenity, and I am finally living.
🩷🤍🩵

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